So Where’s My Happy Ending?
By: Honey, The Writer
So you’ve prayed, you’ve fasted, you’ve cried, and then you prayed some more but what you want still hasn’t come to fruition. You’ve read every relationship book under the sun but you still haven’t attracted Mr. Right. But it seems like your news feed and timeline are full of happy couples. Things like this can cause you to have a crisis of faith and question where exactly is your happy ending. Honestly this is exactly where I am currently in my life’s journey.
My friends are getting engaged, married, or are happy in relationships. And currently I can’t even meet a man that can hold a conversation. I am honestly and genuinely happy for those around me. One of the guiding philosophies of my life is seeing those around me happy and prospering makes me immensely happy and I hope people have the same kind of attitude about me. But even through my happiness for others I can’t help but wonder where exactly my happy ending is. And recently I had a crisis of faith; I’d given up. I stopped going to church and disconnected from meaningful friendships then fell into a depression and threw myself a pity party.
Thankfully I snapped out of it and realized that just because I’m ready for something doesn’t necessary mean it’s ready for me. I’m a very special person not in a vain sense but I’m different from a lot of mid-20 somethings. I’m a single mother, very opinionated, and very quirky. I came to realize that most guys my age don’t have the maturity to deal with my various idiosyncrasies. Even though I know I’m ready for a relationship of substance who I need probably isn’t ready for me. So in your desire for a relationship keep this in mind. Yes, you may be ready for a real relationship and a relationship of substance. But is the person that you need packaged up and ready to go? If not, learn how to wait but in the meantime truly and honestly enjoy yourself and take care of yourself.
The worst thing I did was wallow in self-pity and throw myself a pathetic pity party inviting negative thoughts and in return shrouding myself in a negative aura attracting more negativity. I had to shake it off! I got back into the gym, I traveled (even if it was just out of town to grab a bite to eat), and I poured my energy into the things I love (my daughter and my writing). Never allow yourself to feel sorry for yourself. Find a way to put things into perspective. I hate to sound cliché but things could be worse. Don’t focus on the things you don’t have focus on the things you DO have and be thankful for them.
Also never settle for less than what you deserve (know what you deserve and demand it). You’re a queen and you shouldn’t be fucking with the court jester. Remember this acronym F.L.Y. (FIRST LOVE YOURSELF). Before considering loving someone else make sure you truly and immensely love yourself and the love you deserve will come.
No, your Prince Charming may not pull up on the scene today in a 7-series BMW in an Armani suit but he is coming. He is somewhere being crafted and perfected to fulfill your needs (some which you didn’t even realize you had). Be faithful, stay hopeful, and most importantly stay positive. Find your passion! What if you had to do it for free still makes you happy?
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